The Emperor's New Groove

Oh Disney.  This weeks film puts a particular dent in my groove.  It's The Emperor's New Groove.

Do you recall how in my last review I hoped that some of these post Disney Renaissance films would surprise us with unexpected greatness?  The Emperor's New Groove is not that film.  It holds no great surprises or greatness at all.  Harsh.  But true.  It is the first film on this journey that I've desperately wanted to turn off after only 5 minutes.  And it didn't get better.  The film premiered in 2000 and was not a flop.  Shock of shocks.  I guess people found it funny.  It is branded as a "buddy-comedy."  I didn't laugh once.  And the only grin I wore was a grimace.  I think this film was even more painful than Saludos Amigos.  And that is saying something.  Well let's get down to business...

The Emperor's New Groove is the story of Kuzco (a young, narcissistic, selfish, unlikable emperor) and his transformation to a llama.  (I wish I was making this up!)  It turns out that Kuzco should not have fired Yzma (his advisor, and one of the creepiest-looking Disney villains ever.  I mean I guess the evil queen as the hag in Snow White may have her beat, but Yzma just looks terrible. All. The. Time.)  Yzma also has some creepy magical powers, hence how Kuzco becomes a llama.  (Though it should be noted that Yzma actually intends to kill Kuzco.)  The llama bit is a mistake by perhaps the funniest character in the film: Kronk (Yzma's brawn over brain henchman).

Kuzco finds himself lost in the jungle (as a talking llama) with not a soul or friend to turn to for help.  Enter Pancho.  Pancho had seen Kuzco earlier that day when Kuzco had announced plans to destroy Pancho's entire village to make a water park for himself.  (I'm still not making this stuff up.  This is legitimate Disney plot right here.  Oy vey.)  Pancho's heart, however, is bigger than Kronk's biceps and so he helps poor Kuzco out and they begin their oft treacherous, never really heart-warming travels back to Kuzco's palace.

Have I mentioned that I really didn't like this movie?  I think my number one problem was that I didn't like any of the characters.  For me to enjoy any film, I have got to like the characters - and this film offered me no one to enjoy, root for, or care about.  I guess Pancho is noble in his own way, but the film isn't really about him...  It's filled with this annoying llama!  (Sorry.  I shall try to stop ranting.)  This film was distinctly lacking the warmth, heart, and great story that defines Disney movie greatness.

And I think I'm just going to call it a day on this film review...  If you find this film funny, good for you.  If you don't, I absolutely commiserate.  (And it's ok to turn it off.  You won't miss a thing.)

This week let's end with some words of wisdom from the man himself, Mr. Walt Disney:

I always like to look on the optimistic side of life, but I am realistic enough to know that life is a complex matter.

Coming Up Next: Atlantis: The Lost Empire

Dinosaur

This week’s Disney film is Dinosaur. 

 

The film premiered in 2000 and was a financial success.  I was not one of the multitude of movie viewers to see this film 14 years ago, and thus I in no way helped to make it a financial success.  This movie was decidedly off my radar.  I never saw it.  I don't even remember hearing much about it.  At the time though I'm fairly certain that I was not interested in dinosaurs.  At all. 

 

Not to say that I'm hugely in to them now...  But they definitely pique my curiosity.  It may be that I finally beheld the wonder of Steven Spielberg's Jurassic Park.  (Love that movie!  Don't know why!  But I do!)  So much so that I even read Michael Crichton's novel on which the movie is based.  The book is even better than the movie!  Still can't explain why I enjoy it so much...

 

So with this new openness to the mysterious beings of dastardly extinction... I was still not excited to see this Disney film.  I honestly had no prior concept of the plot, characters or general theme of this film: Dinosaur.  I wish I could say that I was pleasantly surprised and that this film owns up to all that is Disney greatness, but I can't.

 

Dinosaur tells the story of Aladar, an iguanodon (rather large herbivore, but much smaller than a brontosaurus) raised by lemurs.  I kid you not.  Lemurs.  Small monkey-like, leaping mammals.  Oh Disney.  Who came up with this plot?!  Alas, the island where Aladar and his lemur family lives is destroyed by asteroids or meteors or... something like that.  He and 4 lemurs survive the destruction of the island and swim to the "mainland?"  There they meet up with a multi-species herd of dinosaurs who are all traveling to the nesting grounds in hopes that the area is still thriving.  Aladar quickly befriends the oddballs of the group (the old and slow), butts heads with the leader of the herd (Kron), and starts crushing on a lovely lady iguanodon (Neera).  Oh.  And two ravenous, carnivorous Carnotauruses (like a T. Rex, but not a T. Rex) are hot on the trail of the migrating herbivore pack. 

 

I'm not really sure what to say about this film.  It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be?  Though that hardly seems like praise.  I was discussing this film with a friend and she mentioned that it showed Disney's creativity and innovation.  Which it does.  The film is a mix of computer-generated characters set against actual live footage of real settings.  To me it just made the dinosaurs look all the more fake, but at the time and even now it still shows a certain ingenuity.  I will say that the movie poster is cool. But in terms of the whole movie... 

 

I didn't really fall in love with any of the characters.  Aladar is a decent hero, but there's nothing about him or the story that tugs at my heartstrings.  Also, I didn't find anything in the film particularly funny.  And there's no music.  So to sum up, we have zero Disney great characters, zero Disney music, zero Disney humor, and zero Disney heart.  Like I said earlier, I think the best thing I can say is that the film wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. 

 

These post Disney Renaissance films are going to be an interesting part of this film journey.  It's pretty impossible to compete with the Disney greatness of the nineties, but we shall see.  Hopefully there will be some good surprises along the way.  Dinosaur does not happen to be one of them.

 

On that note, I'll leave you with a Disneyland-reference Jurassic Park quote:

 

John Hammond: All major theme parks have delays.  When they opened Disneyland in 1955, nothing worked!

Dr. Ian Malcolm: Yeah, but, John, if The Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down, the pirates don't eat the tourists.

 

 

Coming Up Next: The Emperor's New Groove

Fantasia 2000

Nearly 60 years after the premiere of Fantasia, Walt Disney studios brings you Fantasia 2000.

 

 

The film has much the same premise as the original – a series of animated shorts set to classical and iconic musical pieces.  The only dialogue in the film happens between segments when a celebrity or musician introduces the music and story of the upcoming piece in the film.  My favorite part of Fantasia 2000 was that it was only half as long as Fantasia.  I much prefer for my entertainment to be diverting as opposed to grandly artistic.  And the Fantasia films are all about the artistry of animation and musical compositions.  In essence, they are not my cup of tea.  But I set out this year to watch and review every animated Disney film in the Disney canon, so here are my thoughts on Fantasia 2000.

 

Fantasia 2000 is composed of 8 segments or compositions or pieces.  As with the original Fantasia, some of the pieces seem to tell a story while some are purely artistic and abstract.  Similarly to the first film, I enjoyed some of the segments but could really do without others.  Fantasia 2000 did feature a repeat of Mickey's "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" segment.  This was the only segment to be repeated from the original film.

 

The artistic pieces (that I could really have done with out) include the abstract triangle butterfly opening number...

 

The flying humpback whale ballet... (I know.  I thought I would have liked that one too.)

 

The New York City "Rhapsody in Blue" number... (I also thought I would have enjoyed this more, but I just didn't jive with the artistic direction it took.)

 

And the ending number involving a stag and the spirit of spring?  It was weird...

 

The two numbers that I thought were ok were the flamingo piece (featuring a yoyo)...

 

And the "Pomp and Circumstance" number featuring Donald Duck and Noah's Ark  (also a bit odd, but at least there was plot)

 

My favorite segment by far was "The Steadfast Tin Soldier" number, though in truth I think this would have been a wonderful story to see executed as a full-length movie.  Still it was my favorite story from Fantasia 2000.

 

When Walt originally came up with the concept for Fantasia, the idea was that it would be a continually evolving piece.  It would feature some of the favored classic pieces, but it would also continue to introduce new segments of animation and musical compositions.  I will not hesitate to admit that I am not sad (at all) that this particular project of Walt’s did not come to fruition.  I also freely admit that this concept and style of film is decidedly not my cup of tea, but kudos to all that do enjoy it.

 

With that, it seems like an excellent week to end with an inspiring quote for Walt himself:

 

“Why worry?  If you’ve done the very best you can, worrying won’t make it any better.”

 

 

Coming Up Next: Dinosaur

Tarzan

This week's film takes us on a journey to the jungles of Africa.  It's Disney's Tarzan.

Tarzan premiered in 1999 and is considered the last film of the 10 movie Disney Renaissance.  Before watching this movie for this year-long project, I had only seen the film once.  And that was 15 years ago at a Drive-In in New Hampshire. (The other film we saw that night was Inspector Gadget.)  This summer I did, however, see a wonderful community production of the musical Tarzan which is based on the movie, so watching this movie again was not as "new" as the 15 year lapse between viewings would appear to make it.

Tarzan tells the story of a boy who is raised by gorillas in the African jungle after he and his parents are shipwrecked and he is left an orphan.  Tarzan never truly feels like he fits in with his new family, but he works hard to be the best gorilla he can be.  A new world is opened to him, however, with the arrival of the Porters and Clayton (their guide).  Jane Porter and her father are in Africa to observe and catalog the diverse flora and fauna (Nope. Not that Flora and Fauna.) with the real hopes of observing gorillas in their native habitat.  Clayton (one of the film's villains) is actually there to capture the gorillas so he can take them back to England and sell them.  Tarzan meets/rescues Jane and suddenly he doesn't feel so different anymore...

There are three main things that stood out to me in this film: Jane Porter, the violence, and the music.

Jane Porter rocks.  I enjoyed her character so much!  She is a proper young lady from England but embraces the jungle "culture" so to speak and is willing to let her hair down.  She also always has something to say.  (I may be able to relate to that a bit...)  And she is kind and curious and willing to laugh.  And she handles strange jungle situations remarkably well.  Jane is definitely me favorite character from this film.

I'm not sure why, but the violence in this movie really stood out to me.  I was hyper aware of the presence of guns.  Then there is the real life jungle violence of macho gorillas and sly cheetahs.  The first scenes involving the cheetah scared me significantly when I saw the movie at the drive-in 15 years ago, and to be quite honest, I covered my eyes for parts of them this time around. (I DO NOT do suspense well. At all.)  This film certainly does not shy away from violence - whether of nature or man.

Surprisingly, (Ok. Really not surprising at all.) my favorite part of this film is the MUSIC!  Phil Collins composed and performed the majority of songs in the film, and they are wonderful!  I tend to prefer the music of films when it is sung by the actual characters on film, but Phil Collins' soundtrack for this film was so good I didn't even mind that the characters weren't singing themselves.  I really enjoy the ENTIRE soundtrack of Tarzan, but I guess if I had to pick my favorite tracks I would go with "Two Worlds" and "You'll Be In My Heart."

Tarzan has many elements of a great Disney film including gorgeous animation.  It may not be one of my all time favorites, but it's still quite good and a very enjoyable film to watch.

With that, I'll leave you with Jane Porter's depiction of her first interaction with our hero:

"I was saved!  I was saved by a flying wild man in a loincloth."



Yep. That pretty much sums things up.

Coming Up Next Week: Fantasia 2000

Mulan

“Let’s get down to business!  To defeat the Huns!”  This week’s Disney film charges into fans’ hearts and funny bones.  It’s Mulan.

 

 

The film premiered in 1998 and is one that I actually remember seeing in theaters.  J  It is based on the legend of Mulan – a young woman in China who disguises herself as a man to join the Emperor’s royal army so that her aging father will not be forced to fight.  As legend would tell it, she becomes the single grain of rice that tips the scale in China’s victory against the Huns’ invasion.  The film tells this legend with classic Disney flair. 

 

 

For me, this is Disney’s funniest film.  Just thinking of the characters and songs makes me grin.  J  On top of the film’s awesome humor, Mulan makes a great heroine.  She regularly acts selflessly to keep others safe, she works hard and refuses to give up, she uses ingenuity to get out of many a sticky situation, and and… and… she’s just Mulan.  She’s a likable, relatable character who cares about her family and friends and works hard to protect them.

 

 

Mulan tells a heartwarming tale and it's hilarious! I don't even know where to start... The supporting cast of characters (minus the very non-humorous scary Huns lead by Shan-Yu) all contribute to the story in some funny way.  I can't possibly list them all (and I don't want to give all of the funny parts away), but here are some of my favorite stand-out funny characters in the film.  First up is Mulan's Grandmother Fa.  She is a little old woman with enough spunk to fill a village. ("Who spit in her bean curd?") 

 

 

Grandmother Fa enlists the unwilling help of the "lucky" cricket- Crickee to help Mulan as she meets the matchmaker. (Fiddler reference anyone?...)  Crickee delivers comedic gold without ever actually delivering a line.  (Reminds me of this funny raccoon I know...)  And the academy award for comedic genius in Mulan has got to go to Mushu!  He is a demoted red dragon (lizard) who ends up as Mulan's unintentional sidekick on her journey in the army.  He is voiced by Eddie Murphy and he's hilarious.  Seriously.  Every scene.  Funny stuff.  :)

 

 

Like its predecessors, Mulan is filled with great music!  Every song is wonderful!  But I'll just touch on two here.  First up is "Reflection" sung by Mulan in the film (and sung famously by Christina Aguilera in the credits).  It is a beautiful song that speaks to the heart of the film about Mulan's search to balance being true to herself (credit song reference!) and meeting society's expectations.  Thankfully by the film's end being herself wins! 

 

 

And finally we get to my FAVORITE (non-romantic) song in the Disney Canon: "I'll Make a Man Out of You."  It's in my top three favorite Disney songs EVER.  It's sung in the film by Shang (Captain of the army where Mulan is training), and Shang is voiced by Donny Osmond.  This song is upbeat, moves the story along well and is funny as all get out!!!  I mean.  "I'll make a man out of you."  Sung to soldiers where there actually happens to be a woman.  The irony!  This is so up my funny bone alley.  The song is a delight to watch from start to finish.  It makes a great road-trip, open-window car tune.  And it's a great addition to workout and cleaning playlists.

 

 

Mulan.  If you haven't seen it, watch it.  If you have seen it, watch it again.  It's definitely one of my favorites.

 

This week I'll end with a beautiful quote from the Emperor of China:

 

The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of them all.

 

 

 

Coming Up Next Week: Tarzan

Hercules

"Who put the 'glad' in gladiator?  HERCULES!"  This song has been stuck in my head ever since I watched Disney's 35th animated feature: Hercules.

The film premiered in 1997 and tells the legend of Hercules, son of the Greek gods Zeus and Hera.  His childhood on Mount Olympus is cut drastically short when Hades (god of the underworld) sends his minions (Pain and Panic) to make Hercules mortal and end his life.  Pain and Panic fail to fully execute this plan, but Hercules is left mortal (with god-like strength) and as such can no longer live on Mt. Olympus. He is raised by a kind, childless couple but always feels like he doesn't fit in and longs to find the place where he belongs. Once he grows up, Zeus appears to him and tells him that if he can prove himself a real hero on Earth, he will be able to regain his immortality and return to Mt. Olympus. Hercules sets off to do just that.

 

On his quest from "zero to hero," Hercules is joined by an eccentric bunch of characters.  His faithful steed (and flying horse), cleverly named Pegasus, journeys with him and helps him in his battles against various monsters.  Before they battle monsters though, Hercules must first enlist and survive the satyr Philoctetes' (aka Phil) rugged training program. Phil is one of the film's comedic gems (voiced by the funny man himself, Danny DeVito). On his journey to hero, Hercules also runs into a D.I.D. (Damsel In Distress)- the lovely (but self-sufficient) Megara (aka Meg). Meg's jaded and sarcastic self becomes an integral character in Hercules journey. (Also Meg is voiced by Susan Egan! Susan is the original Belle from Beauty and the Beast on Broadway! My favorite Broadway show!)

 

 

No review of Hercules would be complete without mention of Hades- the film's villain. He's definitely bad. But his acerbic wit and failed plans make him more comedic than scary... In fact, he may have the funniest scenes of the entire film.  However, in the name of full disclosure, I must confess that as a child Hercules freaked me out.  As in, I saw it and had to have my parents pick me up from a sleepover with my cousins.  In third grade. I do not like the whole underworld swirling pit of dead souls thing.  Watching this film as an adult, I still found the spirituality-portrayed aspects of the film unsettling.  And it is definitely one of the films that I would suggest parents consider closely before showing it to their kiddos.

On the Disney spectrum of greatness, Hercules passes the music portion with flying colors!  The "Muses" narrate through song most of the film with gospel-choir harmonies and style.  And their lyrics are decidedly clever (and funny!). We've also got "Go the Distance" sung by Hercules, but made even more famous by Michael Bolton's credit cover of the song. And then Meg (voiced by a Broadway star) sings "Won't Say I'm in Love" with the Muses as backup singers- definitely another musical win for Disney.

Before I close, I have to also mention that I did not particularly care for the style of this film.  It was more abstract than reality-driven with disproportioned angles and ratios used throughout the animation. I'm not a very artsy person and prefer realism and symmetry. That said, it wasn't a deal breaker for the film; it was just something that I didn't particularly enjoy. There were still lots of beautiful animated shots as well...

This week I'll leave you with some wisdom from Zeus:

For a true hero isn't measured by the size of his strength, but by the strength of his heart.

 

Coming Up Next Week: Mulan

The Hunchback of Notre Dame

HelllLLLOOO Everyone!  I apologize for my long absence.  I was on vacation, and as such took a blogging break.  I’m back now and plan to get us caught up on our Disney film adventure over the next week.  J

 

The movie that we left off with premiered in 1996.  It's The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

 

 

My first thought on this film is that it is NOT a kid movie.  It’s an adult plot, with adult content and adult themes.  I’m vastly puzzled that it earned a “G” rating.  It is still a beautiful film, but it has some of the darkest content of a Disney movie.  Definitely one to wait to show your kids until you deem it age-appropriate (and to be perfectly honest, I don’t think most kids would find the movie terrible interesting or engaging even if you factor out the adult themes.)

 

 

Of course.  This is still Disney.  And part of the Disney Renaissance for that matter.  And as such, there is still much beauty to be found in the film.

 

 

The ending note of the opening number is one such thing of beauty.  Goodness gracious!  I readily admit that I go absolutely weak in the knees for "big singing," and this note is about as big as they come.  It flows beautifully with the music and ends the song (and starts the movie) with excitement and grandeur and happiness.  For me, it's even better than the "Circle of Life" opening.  Oh.  Right.  I should probably tell you the name of the song... it's "The Bells of Notre Dame."

 

 

The Hunchback of Notre Dame is based on the novel of the same name by Victor Hugo.  I have not read the book; however its synopsis leaves me quite baffled as to how this became Disney family fare...  Moving on.  Hunchback tells the story of Quasimodo, a misshapen young man who has lived his entire life shut away from the rest of the world in the Bell Tower of Notre Dame Cathedral under the guardianship of Frollo (the film's dastardly villain).  Frollo keeps Quasimodo locked away and works to rid the city of the harmless gypsies whilst employing exceedingly cruel punishments to anyone unable to evade his capture.  The other main characters in our tale are Captain Phoebus (sent to help Frollo, but he ends up fighting against him) and Esmeralda (the gypsy woman loved by Quasimodo, Frollo (YUCK!!!), and Captain Phoebus).

 

 

 

I had only seen this film once as a child, and the only thing that I could remember was that there was a large fire that burns through the city.  Watching the film as an adult, I find the themes and plot darker and more destructive still than my limited memories from childhood.  There is little to be found by way of humor.  Frollo is the vilest Disney villain I've yet to come across.  And the tale is filled with violence and darkness. 

 

 

 

Surprisingly, my favorite part of the film was the music.  (I know.  Huge shocker there.)  I've already shared my delight in the film's opening number.  The film is also scored beautifully and features the musical loveliness of "Out There" sung by Quasimodo and "God Help the Outcasts" sung by Esmeralda.

 

 

The imagery and music make The Hunchback of Notre Dame a beautiful film; however it is a far cry from the "happily-ever-after" Disney tale we are accustomed to.

 

This week I'll leave you with a bit of wisdom from the film:

 

"Take it from an old spectator.  Life's not a spectator sport.  If watchin' is all you're gonna do, then you're gonna watch your life go by without ya."

 

I experienced a real life example of this tonight at my softball game.  I let my fear of missing the ball, keep me from swinging.  Next week, I'm swinging.  :)  'Tis better to try and fail than fail to try.

 

Coming Up Next Week: Hercules